Anna vs. Yun

I think God is really big! I suppose this is stating the obvious but I don't just mean his dimensions, or lack of them; God is big in every way we can imagine and in all the other ways we can't.

I've been reading The Heavenly Man, the story of a Chinese Christian called Brother Yun who has seen thousands of people become Christians whilst undergoing horrific persecution in communist China. The thing is, I don't understand how both Yun and I can exist and be loved by God.

This man has suffered so much for his faith, refusing to renounce Christ during months of torture, he memorized large sections of the Bible and preached and taught from memory rather than from a nice Bible of his own and a million other theology books and discipleship tools. His ministry has been incredibly fruitful and continues to equip and release missionaries from China to the rest of the world. I however live comfortably, with relatively insignificant challenges spending much of my time thinking about theological minutae in the hope that I will have some significance in building the kingdom of God. How can we both be reconciled to the standard Christian understanding of God? How am I allowed to exist?

The only possible answer is that God is big, bigger than I could ever presume to understand and that his grace, the basis on which he accepts me, is magnificent, pure and simple.